The Unicorn Frap is Killing Starbucks Baristas

Starbucks, genius marketers that they are, released a limited edition “Unicorn Frappuccino” and it’s killing their baristas. Really.

Related: Buy This Unicorn Latte Instead – It Helps Women Entrepreneurs!

Unless you’ve never scrolled through Instagram, you know that “unicorn” and rainbow drinks, bites, cakes, bagels, etc., etc., have been all the rage. Usually, they’re pink and layered and contain a multitude of whipped cream, sprinkles, and broken dreams.

Starbucks jumped on the trend and upped the ante, adding a unicorn frappuccino to their menu BUT ONLY FOR FIVE DAYS. And the unicorn becomes even more elusive…

This sent customers into a sugar-fueled frenzy and it’s stressing baristas out, y’all. The recipe calls for a cream-frap base with various pumps of white mocha, vanilla syrup, mango syrup, and classic syrup (that’s the pink). It’s layered with a sour blue drizzle and then topped off with whipped cream and pink and blue powder (sweet and sour, respectively).

It’s apparently a sticky, time-consuming pain to make and baristas are losing their minds. Especially one Braden Burns, 19 and from Colorada, who got on Twitter and posted: “My hands are completely sticky; I have unicorn crap all in my hair and on my nose. I have never been so stressed out in my entire life.”

Since then he’s toned it down (maybe cause Starbucks is his employer?) and said the drink is great but it’s hard to make so many at once. Anyways, he’s not alone. A post on Reddit:

We’re almost out of the blue mucus. Our cold bar counter is bright purple. One of our blenders shattered while making a unicorn with extra unicorn sh*t. One of my partners is screaming.

Edit 5:30 pm: Out of blue unicorn mucus. Putting in extra blue unicorn dandruff instead. As one customer said, “as long as it looks the same!”

Edit 7:35pm: The unicorn is dead. RIP unicorn. People are rioting outside.

We tried it, in the name of research. (Watch below.) But it was for you. We’d never do it on our own. And for the sake of your friendly neighborhood baristas, don’t order anymore.